Agenda Rules

Fifteenth Annual Santa Crawl will be held on December 2nd, 2006
First Bar : TBD @ 1:00

Drink UP!

Welcome Santa Crawlers!

First off, in case you're totally unfamiliar with what to expect on Santa Crawl Saturday (December 2), you need to recognize what happens when 100+ guys in Santa suits drink alcoholic beverages from 1pm - 2am. Some start late due to other engagements, some finish early due to over-eager consumption. And then of course, some stay for the duration even after consuming too much too fast. We call them rock stars.

The benefit is that a natural flow of the too drunk exiting, and the too sober entering, makes for a great party. Theoretically, a few Santas are thinking clearly enough to prevent the group from committing acts of debauchery or criminality that are beyond the regrettable "it seemed like a good idea at the time."

Let's not forget that Santa Crawl occurs in Baltimore City, which has the highest rates of heroin addiction and STD's in the US. That being said, you DO NOT want to spend any time in the jail, especially while wearing a Santa suit.

The Crawl starts on Pratt St. In downtown Baltimore. You get acclimated to people honking and waving at you in your costume real quickly. The bars have lots of people in them and we're sober, so you just learn to go with it. No reason to be embarrassed after the first 20 minutes. Also, you try and meet a few of the other Santas while you're still sober. You never know how one of these guys might save your life in 8-12 hours.

The Fifteenth Santa Crawl will be held on December 2nd, 2006, and will begin promptly at 1:00 PM. Remember that's 1:00 PM for the starting time, and NOT 12:00 or 12:30 PM. Please remember this, 'cuz Santa can look real silly standing by himself in a bar.

The first bar is TBD. We will be bringing copies of this itinerary and song sheets to the crawl.



Reindeer Games

One of the best times a person can have all year, our Battle-Tested Santas will:

  • meet people
  • meet women
  • confuse the crap outta kids
  • fill everyone you meet with joy
  • dance (as needed)
  • become instant celebrities and rock stars
  • get hugs from the girls from Hooters
  • meet women
  • hook with a Hooter's girl (a rarity)
  • sing twisted Christmas tunes!


Santa Links

There are others out there that have joined the movement. The Truth IS out there!

GEAR UP!!

If you've still got the cajones

to dress w/100 fellow brethren in Santa Suits, then join us in our merry escapades this year!

Where: Baltimore (Charm City)

When: 2 December 2006

Why: Why the hell not!!

How: On foot, by cab, or with a drunk toothless girl from LaPlata, MD (not recommended.)

Veteran Tips

Where's Hooters? Being a Veteran Santa, there are a few tips and tricks you'll need in your quest for ultimate wisdom (read: silly drunk, spirited fun). Read on Grasshopper and Learn:

  • Never hang out with Santa Padge for more than 15 minutes
  • Be sure to spread the Elf Wealth where possible
  • DON'T let anyone DRIVE! NO EXCUSES.
  • Bring EXTRA Santa hats and CANES
  • PLEASE TIP and don't steal anything from da bars
  • DON'T EVER be anywhere ALONE in your SUIT!
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